I Am Your Costumer, Right? [Gintama Fanfiction]

Takasugi slipped in. He did not even check, what kind of establishment it was. It will work, as long as he does not meet any known people, like the accident last month. Really, what was Gintoki thinking of working at the gay bar. He doesn't even like sex, or cross-dressing. Thought he saw Gintoki when he really needed to cross-dress for a mission, and it put a lot of women to shame as how feminine he was.

"Welcome in Takamagahara." said Hachirou. "I apologize, but this establishment is for women."

Takasugi now looked around, noticing that he apparently entered the host club. He relaxed his face, as he looked down, his hand, mostly hidden by kimono raised toward his face. The other hand corrected his kimono. "But, I am a woman." he said, his voice confused. "I just really wanted to try it once." His face got red.

Takasugi felt humiliated by the action, but there were way too many people outside looking for him. Going out now would be out of question.

Hachirou blinked, then showed her to go forward. "Come right it, miss..."

"Kojima. Kojima Ginko." Takasugi said.

"Miss Kojima. It is 3.000 yens for two hours." Hachirou said, as he took her to the table. "I will call the host to you right away."

45 minutes and 3 hosts later Takasugi was bored. Playing the girl was annoying, his pursuers did not seems to notice him entering here and the hosts were boring. He hated that he started to play the shy person, but it was the only one that he was fairly confident could fool anybody.

He was approached by the blond haired guy. The current host excused himself and Takasugi was happy that he was able to put an end on another boring host. He looked at the guy now, his face full of joy and admiration. He could puke.

"Miss Kojima. My name is Honjou Kyoushirou, and I am going to be your host for the next 15 minutes." he said, as he bowed a little. "May I sit down."

Takasugi gave permission, and the guy sat down. Takasugi had heard of him before. He was apparently the number one host in Kabuki. He hoped that this was not going to be so boring as to make him numb against everything.

"I haven't expected Kyoushirou to grace me with his presence." he said. He could not care less.

Kyoushirou smiled. "Why would I not want to be in the presence of a fine lady like you?"

'Lady my ass.' Thought Takasugi, but he did not utter it out loud.

"I was actually hoping to have one of the new hosts join us. Would that be alright with you?"

Takasugi nodded, but he just hoped that his person would be at least a tiny bit interesting.

Kyoushirou waived to somebody, and Takasugi wanted to look and see what kind of person will come there. But the person came from the other side, and Takasugi did not notice him until he was already there, speaking.

"Kyoushirou. Miss." he bowed, and then sat on the other side, as Kyoushirou waived him.

Takasugi now thanked all of the playing skills that he had, when he recognized one of the few people that he knew that he can not fool. That silver perm was way to distinctive, and there is no way that he had made a mistake.

"Miss Kojima. This is our newcomer, Sakata Gintoki."

Sakata turned to him, giving his a small bow. "It is a pleasure to meet you, miss Kojima."

"No, no. The pleasure is all mine." said Takasugi. "You must be really talented to work under somebody as skillful as Kyousirou."

"Not really, sometimes it seems that Kyoushirou just took pity on me." said Gintoki.

Takasugi noticed the tense microexpressions, and he then knew that yes, Gintoki did recognize him and for some reason is perfectly fine with pretending to not know him. Which still puts him in a weird situation. One he could not control.

Gintoki made sure to pour all three of them a glass, as Kyoushirou was listening to Takasugi's make up story. Takasugi had fun making a story about the visit that he did today and how he was about to get married to a governmental official, but wanted to see if that really was the right choice.

There was a champagne call, and Kyoushirou excused himself as he waived Gintoki to come with him. The lights in the club changed and he noticed that most people went to one table and all the people started to sing. Well, if it means that he could have some time for himself, than that is more than good by his standards.

A couple of minutes later Kyoushirou and Gintoki returned. Kyoushirou had to excuse himself, as he had a regular coming, and asked if Gintoki could be the one staying here. Which Takasugi agreed immediately.

Gintoki was glancing at the way Kyoushirou was leaving, and he did not relax until he was at another table.

"So, miss Kojima." Gintoki started to tease. "Is there anything that I can do for you?"

"I know that I am not fooling you, Gintoki." he smiled.

Gintoki leaned back. "You could have forgoten then name of your 'new' identity."

"Let me remind you who out of us had the lower grades in school." said Takasugi as he leaned back.

Gintoki shrugged. "Zura beat both of us in that regard."

They were looking at each other for a couple of seconds, but the one that broke it was Gintoki. He looked down. "So, what are you doing here, Takasugi?"

"I am hiding for the police." Takasugi said.

Gintoki looked up. "Really?"

Takasugi glared at him. Would he joke about that? Alright, maybe he would.

"What did you do this time?" Gintoki asked. "Killed another governmental official?"

"I wish. But killing that person would be counterproductive to my plan." Takasugi said. "Officially it was trespassing and being a wanted man. Unofficially, neither the Shinsengumi nor Mastudaira were supposed to be there."

"Fame can be a negative thing as well." Gintoki said. "Maybe this will teach you a lesson."

"Like you managed to learn any lesson." said Takasugi.

"At least I did not skip the lesson in growing. You as still as small as always." said Gintoki. "Maybe you need to to have your parents pay for it."

Takasugi sighed. "Will you ever stop mentioning my blood family? And last time I checked I was the customer. You were supposed to prase me."

Gintoki blinked. "It just feels weird doing it with you."

Takasugi waited. He expected Gintoki to just give up. But Gintoki started to pour them. Complementing his looks, complementing his intelligence, his height, which was new, his actions and so on. He was really good at this, but it was clear, that he was uncomfortable with this.

Gintoki stopped, like he started to look for words. Then he said: "Can I get you a head scratch instead of compliments?"

"Head scratch?" Takasugi asked.

"You used to like them." Gintoki said, as he looked at him.

Takasugi looked at Gintoki warily, but he then moved his head, so it ended up in Gintoki's lap. He was looking at Gintoki, daring him to try and do something else.

But Gintoki did just move his hands, and starting to massage the parts of the head that he could reach.

Takasugi felt how not only his head, but also his body started to relax. His brain started to work quicker, like at the time when the adrenaline goes through the blood system, but without the added stress.

There were steps coming closer. He felt Gintoki's hands stop for some reason, and he glanced up. There was another host there, and he looked at Gintoki with hate. "It is time to change."

Gintoki started to slowly remove his hands, but Takasugi stopped him and put them right back where they were before.

"I guess this settles it?" asked Gintoki, as he started to scratch the head again. Like he should have done it from the start.

"It is additional fee of 5.000 yens for choosing a host." the black haired, pale person said.

Takasugi now looked up, pretending that only now he noticed another person there. "Oh, is it that time already? And I just started to relax." Takasugi looked around the bar.

"As I said, you can keep you host, if you pay the fee." said the host.

"Really? Than I would really like to take this. If possible?" He let the enthusiasms ebb a little as the talked.

"It is possible. Enjoy your time." he said, as he left the table.

As the host left, he leaned back, and he looked at Gintoki. "I hope you are prepared to finish what you started."

Gintoki returned to the head massage, and Takasugi simply enjoyed it.

He then heard the commotion and Gintoki's hands stilled again. Takasugi wanted to ask, what is wrong, when Gintoki said that one word: "Shinsengumi."

Takasugi silently cursed himself. He was here hiding, so he should be more prepared for the time, that they might check the establishment. Not spend his time feeling annoyed by the incompetence of the hosts here.

Gintoki stood up, and he slowly moved to the counter. He talked with the person, there, and Takasugi was just thinking about leaving, when the voice came. "Nobody move. We just want to make sure that a certain known criminal is not hiding here."

"As I said, there are only ladies here. Did you not say that the person you are looking for is a male?" Kyoushirou replied. "So there is no need to scare the costumers here, right."

"It is just a quick check." Hijikata assured him. "The business can happen as usual, we just don't want people to switch tables. And if all the hosts could return to the tables for this time."

Shinsengumi started to look at the tables and there was no way that Takasugi could come out of here without a fight. But it does not matter, this should be fun, he thought as he gripped the handle of his short sword.

Gintoki than came back, and he threw a blond, long wig at him, along with the shirt and trousers, exactly the one that Gintoki was usually wearing, when he was not wearing that stupid three piece dress. "Wear this."

Takasugi looked at it for a second, then pushed his kimono down, as he put the shirt on. Next were trousers, and he put the kimono and the belt on the sofa. Next here his bandages. Than it only took a couple of practiced movements, and he had the wig up as well.

Gintoki had already folded the kimono, put the belt and bandages there as well and threw the jacket carelessly through it. He then took Takasugi's head, and put it on his lap, starting to caress the wig. It did not take more than a minute.

Takasugi thought that it was the waste that he could not really feel it, but not getting captured was a priority. As long as nobody speaks anything, he is on the open.

It was not more than a minute, when he could hear two pairs of shoes stop there.

"Boss, I heard that this is a place for women to enjoy themselves, not men."

Takasugi recognized the voice as Okita Sougo, the first division squad of the Shinsengumi. He heard that he is good with the sword, if the push comes to show.

"Odd-jobs, remember? Kyoushirou asked me to help out, as a lot of hosts came down the the flu." said Gintoki, as he put his hand on Takasugi's shoulder. "But for some reason she fell asleep on me."

"Did you gave her a sleeping pills?" asked Sougo.

"A head scratch." said Gintoki.

"That is no fun. Well, have fun, boss." said Okita, as they moved to the next boot.

Gintoki continued to have the hand on his arm for another couple of minutes. Then the Shinsengumi apologized and left the establishment.

Gintoki only then removed his hand, and Takasugi looked up. Gintoki's face was still tense, as he looked there, probably trying to read the club's atmosphere after this.

Takasugi sat up and slowly looked around. The hosts were all busy, as they tried to make sure their guests were not in any inconvenienced by the police visit. But there seems to be no presence of the police anymore.

He removed his wig, and dressed himself back into his clothes before anybody came to their table. Gintoki refused to look at Takasugi for some reason.

"You seems to be quite friendly with the police." said Takasugi.

"Mhm." said Gintoki.

"Are you two alright?" asked Hachirou. "I am sorry for the interruption."

"But that was kind of fun. I was so nervous." said Takasugi, one hand on his chest. "I was afraid they were looking for me, as I did not tell my family that I was coming here."

"Right." said Hachirou. "Is there anything I can bring you?"

"A parfait!" said Takasugi. He then looked shyly a Gintoki. "Mister Sakata, do you like parfaits?"

That seems to break Gintoki from whatever spell he had been, and he smiled at Takasugi. "I actually love them. You must be quite observant and smart to be able to predict me that well."

"Oh, mister Sakata. You are making me blush." said Takasugi, as he let the red from his embarrassment actually show on his face.

"There is no need to be embarrassed, miss Kojima. You are like a princess." said Gintoki.

They kept the act, until one of the new guys brought them two parfaits and left.

Gintoki started to eat it, for the lack of anything better to do. Takasugi also took a spoon and started eating it. Unlike Katsura, he actually liked sweet things, but he did not need them like Gintoki.

After Gintoki finished, he turned to Takasugi. "Are you leaving?"

"There are still be patrolling the area." Takasugi said, as he looked around. "The people coming inside are still tense."

"Then what about UNO?" Gintoki said, as he brought a pack of cards from his pocket.

"You are keeping an UNO deck with you?" Takasugi asked surprised.

"They are Zura's." Gintoki said, as he started shuffling then, then offered the deck to Takasugi, so he could shuffle it as well.

Gintoki started, and they both got quite involved in the game. The first two were won by Takasugi, but the third, forth and fifth were won by Gintoki. They were getting ready for another match, with Gintoki mixing the cards again.

"I am sorry to interrupt, but we are closing." said Kyoushirou.

"Oh, I am so sorry." said Takasugi. "I still have to pay, right?"

"You can do it at the counter. We will still be there when you come back." said Kyoushirou.

Takasugi went and paid it, then started going back. But as he come closer to the table, he could hear the conversation.

"The police said that he is a dangerous terrorist. I wonder if we could do something to stop him." Kyoushirou said.

"What did you have in mind?" Gintoki replied, his body tense, but Takasugi doubted that anybody but him saw that. As much as he did not want to admit, Gintoki was an even better actor than him.

Takasugi decided to interrupt there. "I am back." He walked to Gintoki and stood there, thinking for a couple of seconds, then kissed Gintoki on the cheek. "I hope we can spend more time together next time."

"Yeah." said Gintoki, as he bowed when he left. He could still hear the next comment that Kyoushirou said to Gintoki.

"So it is not just my heart that you can take over."